Wednesday, March 22, 2006

Lessons Learned

So it would seem I've been dumped. Pre-emptively, I suppose, though I never had any intention of completely severing all communication without warning. I like to think I would have been a bit more tactful, but I guess we'll never know. Although you didn't ask, I'd like to take a moment to tell you what you did wrong and, lest you think it's petty and small of me, I'd like to remind you that you're the one who emailed me first...
  • I'll be the first to admit that I've been out of the "game" for a while, but I don't think a date was ever defined as sitting on your couch editing your term paper.
  • Watching HGTV without talking? Not a good date.
  • Talking to your cats more than you talk to me, when I'm sitting 2 feet away on your couch? Also not a good date.
  • Hooking up your surround-sound system? My pleasure, but not a good date.
  • Baggy jeans, no make-up, hair-undone is understandable on a day off but not on date night.
  • Many guys would be put off by talking about your biological clock and how you're ready to start having babies. (Not me, however. That's a freebie.)
  • Referring to your cats as "fur children" once is cute. Repeatedly doing so will make me wish I were allergic. (And they are obese.)
  • Yes, you work with kids all day long, but leave the baby-talk at the office.
  • Ok, I realize that working 12-hour days, 13 out of 14 days isn't exactly your "fault" but I'd like to inform you that you're officially too busy to date.
Anyway, I hoped we'd stay friends even though you don't like any good food. And no, I don't think I'm perfect either. I know I creep most people out. The good news is that I've opened a branch in Dallas for creeping people out up there and I'm off to a good start.


At 1:24 AM, Blogger Jammie J. said...

Ummm, okay, I've done all of those things. Admittedly not until after I was pretty sure he was gonna ask me to marry him. ;)

At 8:53 AM, Blogger kcterrilynn said...

'Fur children'? Seriously? Yikes. I mean, I have cats and I've never refered to them as fur anything. Well, fur balls, but that's acceptable, right?

Did all this happen on one date or over several? Not that either answer makes it any more acceptable behavior...I'm just curious. :)

At 9:06 AM, Blogger Mike said...

Great. Now I'm all horny.

At 9:49 AM, Blogger The Tart said...

The Dallas Branch office is clearly not creeped out! We are just big freaks. : )

It was all the paint, too much, everyone got a little jumpy... and for the record, we do not wear baggy jeans, nor do we even own a couch!

So if your travels take you back up to these parts, we promise to behave/act like adults & we do not treat anyone like a kindergartner, natch!

The Tart
~Branch Manager
; )

BTW, we have great Thai food places up here... and we know where they are!

At 10:07 AM, Blogger tinyhands said...

J- Oh I hope she didn't think we were there yet.

KCTL- Most of that was one date, the second. (If you count first meeting at Fourbux a 'date')

ikeMay- How's that 'vicariously-living-through-me' thing working out for ya?

Tart- Big freaks in the Big D, but keep your hands off my cheeks and let me study how you ride the beat. (Yes, I'm determined to post that)

At 12:03 PM, Blogger evilsciencechick said...

oh yeah, red flag after red flag on that one.

I don't think you're losing out on anything by getting dumped here.

At 4:01 PM, Blogger Allie#3ga said...

got any ketchup?

At 7:46 PM, Blogger lucidkim said...

subtle. :)

i'm trying to figure out the work schedule if she works with kids. long school days there in houston...

sorry about all that, but you truly don't sound heartbroken - mostly annoyed???


At 9:48 PM, Blogger tinyhands said...

ESC- There were other reasons I would have gladly overlooked had there been real chemistry. Not polite to mention them here.

Mimi- What's wrong with ketchup? It's chock full o'antioxidants!

Kim- I never said she was a teacher and I'd rather keep it vague. No, not heartbroken, but disappointed yet again.

At 10:18 PM, Blogger Jammie J. said...

Off topic, but I have a Question for you. Oh Razr Guru. I just looked on motorola's website and learned that because my cell phone carrier is Verizon, certain parts of the data software is disabled. Like the most important parts such as the multimedia functions (ringtones & picture transfers). Got any hack ideas on how to bypass that disablement?

At 10:57 PM, Blogger tinyhands said...

J- (reply sent to

At 4:10 PM, Blogger Zelda said...

Ok, it's wrong. I know it's wrong, but I can't help laughing. And this is even more wrong, but I hope you get dumped (or dump someone) at least a few more times before you find The One, because you capture the glaring mediocrity of Not-The-One so perfectly.

In other words, I'm selfish and I love hearing you make fun of people who would refer to their cats as their "fur children."

At 4:43 PM, Blogger Rrramone said...

Dear tiny hands,

Your name and your story are unsettling at best. How long did it take you to arrive at your ultimate conclusion?

Creeped out in Big D

p.s. Don't listen to tart people. Even creepier. :-)

At 12:42 AM, Blogger tinyhands said...

Z- Aha! From Not My Cat to Not The One. Well played, indeed. Don't worry, I'm sure I'll be dumped many many more times and I'll be more than happy to share it with you, though I may demand dim-sum from time to time. Pity-dim-sum, if you will.

Rrramone- All in all, a couple of weeks, though it's easier to identify in hindsight. Thanks for helping out at the Dallas branch.

At 2:41 AM, Blogger The Tart said...

Branch manager can't sleep... checking in with home office.

I see that rrramone has stopped by. Hmmm must remember to monitor his creep output, very important to branch goals!

BTW... the photo above is beautiful, I bet I could sleep better if I climbed up that hill and slipped into that little shrine/hut.


The Tart

At 3:23 AM, Blogger Duly Inspired said...

Oooh. I may have caught this one a bit late but, wow, that's a bit scary. Kudos to you for taking shelter. sheesh... women are FREAKY.

At 1:50 AM, Blogger tinyhands said...

Tart- Believe you me, the climb would leave you exhausted.

1L- Nahh, not as bad as scary or freaky. She just didn't want me in her life and I could have seen it sooner.

At 5:07 PM, Blogger Crystal said...

omg she wasn't trying to say her fatass cats were not fatass cats, was she? that drives me crazy. admit that you are a terrible furmom who can't control her children's diet.


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