Thursday, June 23, 2005

Non sequitur

Whoever came up with the saying "no news is good news" is an asshole. Hey, stupid-saying-guy: Go jump in the lake.

I wonder if she thinks about me half as much as I think about her. I've tried to make myself findable in case she ever comes looking for me, but it doesn't seem to be working, since I can't find me. Could I possibly narrow-down which her I'm thinking about for you? Well, yeah, but that might eliminate the other two. The simplest solution, which is probably the right one, is to stop thinking about any of them altogether. Written down, that looks like too many words. Stop thinking. Stop.

All the time, our customers ask us, "How do you make money doing this?" The answer is simple: Volume. That's what we do.

I've said before that she makes me think about things. I often wonder if I make her think about things. Come to think of it, that seems like an awful lot of thinking and wondering. But, although not necessarily for her, she makes me want to be a better man.

So what if I stole that quote? All of a sudden you can't steal quotes? What's next, you can't burn the flag? Oh, wait ... I don't want to get too far off topic here (and congratulations if you have a clue what the topic is) and I hate blogging about stuff in the media (because opinions are like assholes, everyone's got one) but what exactly is the message you're trying to send by burning the flag? I'm all for upholding free speech, but what exactly is the message here? Wouldn't it be just as effective in getting your point across by burning Bald Eagles in the name of free speech? (Ed. Note: Don, Glenn, Joe, Timothy, and the other Don still have hair...nice try. Bernie's bald, but he quit so he don't count. Oh look, there goes the point.)

And I told her, I don't care if you and grandpa have been married for 5 or 50 years, I'm not going to jail for you. We're not that close.

17 Comments:

At 4:57 AM, Blogger Zelda said...

Hello. My synapses are misfiring and I can't tie my brain down to your post, but I enjoy it when people expose their assholes...I mean opinions for me to judge. Ruthlessly.

Also, did I mentioned that I'm now considering shooting armed robbers in the back?

 
At 7:10 AM, Blogger boo said...

not quite sure what is going on... but i love it... 3 ladies on your mind... very impressive... and who cares about stealing quotes... esp when you own up to it!...

 
At 8:06 AM, Blogger Esther said...

never go to jail for anyone, unless there's large amounts of money involved and love going greek ;)

 
At 10:19 AM, Blogger Mike said...

Zelda, I can't believe there was ever a time when you wouldn't have shot an armed robber in the back.

 
At 10:49 AM, Blogger evilsciencechick said...

huh. that's not the quote I thought you were going to use.

 
At 10:55 AM, Blogger Allie#3ga said...

even though i'm not one of the 3 - i'm thrilled that there ARE 3!

 
At 11:03 AM, Blogger tinyhands said...

Z- I feel safer knowing you're now patrolling the streets in search of vigilante justice. ;)

boo- Must stop... thinking about women.

3sth3r- I wish I could say I've had better offers recently.

Mike- Now every time the local news reports a shooting I expect to hear the shooter described as a smart, brassy woman with a large chest.

ESC- Something from Ben Franklin? Something from 'Friends'? My library is quite diverse.

#3Cracker- Easy.

 
At 10:11 PM, Blogger Kate the Peon said...

I heart TH.

 
At 10:15 PM, Blogger Badaunt said...

THREE? That was the only bit I understood.

Symptoms: Stopped making sense.

Diagnosis: Brain caught in zipper.

Prescription: A good bonk.

(Volunteers?)

 
At 11:06 PM, Blogger Jethro said...

"Truly you have a very dizzy intellect"

 
At 11:44 PM, Blogger mellancollyeyes said...

Three?!?!

And all this time I thought it was only me!

I'm so hurt...

PS when I was reading the bit on flag burning, all I thought was, "Texas v. Johnson, ok!" Sad, so nerdy...

 
At 2:24 AM, Blogger tinyhands said...

Ktp- TH♥KtP

Z- Maybe I should put up a paypal link to fund said bonking?

Jeth- "You don't know the half of it!"

Aide- Wow, the State of Texas sued some guy's dick? Learn something everyday.

 
At 12:09 PM, Blogger jazz said...

hey. you're funny. i'm going to come back.

 
At 3:57 PM, Blogger Zelda said...

Mike - That's just your prejudice talking.

 
At 11:33 PM, Blogger Kate the Peon said...

I really like this post. Not sure what it's about, but I like the whole randomness of it.

 
At 1:41 AM, Blogger tinyhands said...

Jasmine- Hey you're cute. Come back!

Z- I think he meant it in a good way.

KateyBear- I think the title has something to do with it.

 
At 4:26 PM, Blogger Brighton said...

You had me at "Go jump in the lake" *sniff*

 

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