Wednesday, December 01, 2004

My Wasted Heart

That's a line from Love Actually and I like it. It reminds me of Missy, a secretary I worked with once. She wasn't my secretary, rather the front-desk receptionist at the firm I used to work for, but she could be counted on to do all manner of secretarial duties. And beautiful. Christ, beautiful doesn't begin to describe her. Long shapely legs, a generous handful of ass, two full servings of breasts, and BIG brown eyes. Long dark hair with a little curl, but silky smooth at the same time. Great skin, smooth and unblemished. Gently, evenly tanned, characteristic of her hispanic heritage. And I was married.

I remember the day Missy interviewed for the front desk job. I caught a glimpse of her coming in the front door from my office at the rear of the suite. It was about this time of year, if I remember correctly, and she was wearing a short (but not too short) skirt and boots. I love winter, if for no other reason than the women of this town (and hopefully yours) bring out the short skirts and boots. I prayed and prayed that they'd hire her, and they did. The skirts got shorter after that, and the villagers rejoiced. (hurrah!) Missy was the master of the flirt, and she knew exactly which buttons to push. She'd tell me all about how bad her boyfriend was to her and she sure wished I wasn't married. Hell, I was beginning to think the same thing. She'd tell me how she finally dumped the boyfriend, and now all she had was her rabbit to keep her company.

Fast forward to the first time my then-wife moved out. Missy and a few other girls in the office figured it out and took pity on me. Drinks, dinner, more drinks...we wound up back at one girl's apartment and somebody put on some porn. I was on the floor while Missy sat on the sofa behind me playing with my hair. Guys, I swear it sounds like a Penthouse letter- I'm separated, drunk off my ass, watching porn with 2 hot girls and one REALLY hot girl- but I was there and lived to tell...

But nothing happened. I was married and my wife moving out wasn't my idea. I still wanted my marriage to work out. At some point I stood up and asked Missy to drive me back to my car (left at one of the bars). She did and it was a quiet, tense ride in her little pickup. We pulled into the now-empty parking lot and I got out. She rolled down her window, so I walked around to her side of the truck...another long awkward silence. I knew I should lean in and kiss her, at which point she'd follow me in my car back to my house, where she would give me the thing I wanted second-most in my life. Instead, I managed a weak "thanks" to which she replied, "asshole" then rolled-up her window and drove away.

16 Comments:

At 1:01 AM, Blogger tinyhands said...

Sorry, that was longer than I intended. It took me a long time to write, if that's any consolation...

 
At 2:14 AM, Blogger Heather said...

I'm sure you feel that this one of your worse moments in life, and I know recalling it must be painful...But you've inadvertently given me hope! You walked away from porn and two hot girls (even though you were drunk)for your wife. That's incredible. I almost don't believe it.

And then things didn't work out with your wife. Which sucks horribly, but I'm sure you can do much better.

And since it's around 30 degrees outside this time of year, only the really vain, skanky sorority girls crack out the short skirts.

 
At 3:02 AM, Blogger Zelda said...

Oh, the ones that get away....

 
At 6:51 AM, Blogger Badaunt said...

Her parting shot makes me think this is not something you should regret.

 
At 7:25 AM, Blogger Tasty said...

I'm with Badaunt on this one.

 
At 7:34 AM, Blogger se7en said...

Since you are obviously a man with a conscience, you did the right thing. You're lingering feelings of guilt after the fact would have washed out any hopes of having good thoughts about the liason. Of course if you are unattached a good f*ck buddy is always welcome, but I don't think she would have been very good in that way, judging by her comment.
Also you really don't need that kind of tension at work, she sounds like a vindictive type that would love telling everyone how much you sucked in bed even if you didn't. And sorry you and your wife didn't make it, but just when you think you have lost the best thing in your life, something comes along to prove you wrong.

 
At 7:35 AM, Blogger Allie said...

i gotta agree with stacey on this one ... sounds like she was mostly beautiful on the outside.

and even if all she had was the rabbit to keep her company. it can be enough.

 
At 7:49 AM, Blogger Siôn said...

You probably did the right thing, but isn't there something in the back of your head that thinks "what if"?

 
At 10:31 AM, Blogger Mike said...

I've had similar moments in my life (although not quite as dramatic as yours) and after years of reflection I'm left with only one conclusion. I should have had more to drink.

 
At 12:02 PM, Blogger tinyhands said...

Bonnie Heather- Sometimes I don't believe it myself. Any chance I could get you to post some pictures of the skanky sorority girls?? ;)

Theic/Stacey/Seven- You're right, of course, but that doesn't stop me from wistfully remembering.

Al- Sorry if it creeps y'all out, but I love stories about the rabbit. And there were lots of stories about lots of different rabbits...

Siôn- Wrth reswm I weddwl am ei yn aml. Dioleh am dy sylw. (Apologies if my English-Welsh dictionary was a practical joke and I just insulted your mother.) Lovely town, by the way. I never made it further West than Cardiff, and I'm afraid all I really remember was Caerfilly (1985).

Mike- I've read enough of your blog to know you're full of it...you would have done exactly the same thing I did. It's cool, you can front tho. :)

 
At 12:32 PM, Blogger Mike said...

Crap. That's it. I'm rewriting my blog....

Post #1:

Got a hot tip about a chick named Missy. Googled her up and set up a date. She brought along two of her hot friends. Dang, that was SWEET action! Missy kept commenting on my untiny hands. Mmmmmmmm.

 
At 1:08 PM, Blogger Allie said...

hoppity hop hop.

happiness in a box. the best fifty bucks you will ever spend. ( well maybe not "you" ... but "one" or hell, maybe you ... )

 
At 1:28 PM, Blogger Tasty said...

A.) Mike IS full of it.
B.) Personally, I'm a fan of the silver bullet.

 
At 4:44 PM, Blogger me said...

naughty video? drinking? hair playing? a tiny pickup truck? sounds like the apocalypse to me.

 
At 10:16 AM, Blogger Siôn said...

Don't worry. There were no insults in there! Great to hear that Welsh is spreading the world over!

 
At 3:11 PM, Blogger Gary said...

Wow, that really shows incredible love for your wife (as well as some amazing self discipline!)

As this is my first visit to your blog I don't know what happened re. your marriage, but I hope your wife (ex wife?) realises how much you wanted it to work.


Thanks to Siôn for pointing me this way!

 

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