Monday, March 14, 2005

Hate Mail

It seems I'm not immune to the hate mail that's been going around. I promise they won't chase me away, but so that you know what I'm dealing with, here's a sample of the hate mail I've been getting:
Dear Tinyhands,
I hate you. When are you going to blog again?
(Name Withheld)

Dear Tinyhands,
I hate you. Please write about what you did last weekend.
(Name Withheld)

Dear Tinyhands,
I hate you. Your father and I are going to see your
grandmother. Please check on the dog.
(Name Withheld)

Dear Tinyhands,
I hate you. Please send me some more mp3s.
(Name Withheld)

So as you can see, all is not well but I think I'm handling it. To relieve some of the stress I went to pet a goat today. (No, that's not a euphemism sicko.) I took my nephews to the Houston Livestock Show & Rodeo today, though we skipped the rodeo because that costs extra and my nephews would never know the difference anyway. Recall, my nephews are almost 4 and almost 2. Highlight of the day was the petting zoo where we saw goats, sheep, deer, pigs, ducks, chickens, wallabies (don't ask me), bunnies, and a llama. Also high on list of favorites were the pony rides, the milking demonstration, corndogs, and climbing all over the tractors. High on my list of favorites were all the bowlegged women in tight Wranglers.

A word of advice for the neatfreaks- Avoid the livestock show. Sure there's the abundance of poops and droppings, but I really think I may be sliding off the deep end into the realm of obsessive-compulsive handwashing. The livestock show really creeped me out. I loved watching the nephews both get really excited about every little thing but they are clearly not my sons because it only takes about 5 seconds for them to go from petting a goat to the hands back in the mouth (also not a euphemism, sicko). I still shudder to think about it. My kids are going to be bubble children.


At 2:28 AM, Blogger Hooch said...

Your nephews will be hardy children that won't develop asthma or any of those other immune disorders, because they were allowed to play and get dirty. I'm all for it!!

Oh. And I hate you. (didn't want to feel left out).


At 3:27 AM, Blogger Esther said...

Petting zoos are so much fun! I guess you didn't try to milk a cow? ;)

At 6:56 AM, Blogger Badaunt said...

I had a traumatic experience at a local A&P (Agricultural and Pastoral) show when I was a kid, with a baby goat (also a kid). It ate half my skirt when I wasn't looking.

Also, my cousin's mother was fanatic about her washing her hands after petting animals, whereas our parents TOLD us about it but weren't particularly vigilant. "YOU'LL GET RINGWORM!" her mother used to screech at her.

And she did! But we didn't. (IOW Hooch is right.)

At 6:59 AM, Blogger Allie#3ga said...

my hate includes why are you slacking on writing me and where the fuck is my sotd?

At 9:32 AM, Blogger mellancollyeyes said...

sigh...whew, for a bit there, I was really uptight and going through withdrawl symptoms, but not anymore, thankfully...!

ps, who could ever hate you?

At 9:32 AM, Blogger Kate the Peon said...

TH...I lovvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvve yooooooooooooooou.

(I wanted to be different.)

At 9:35 AM, Blogger Zelda said...

You're a dainty fella aren't you?

I hate you. Are you coming out Tuesday? Check your email.

At 12:00 PM, Blogger tinyhands said...

hooch- My nephews are already so dirty I bet the goats get sick.

3sth3r- Unfortunately they wouldn't let us that close to the large animals. The Houston Livestock Show & Rodeo is a VERY big production and quite "controlled".

Theic- I got bit by a goat once upon a time which would be an ideal reason to stay away from them, but strangely, no trauma.

Al- You said fuck!

At 12:02 PM, Blogger Jethro said...

So much hate mail so little time. You need to report them so that I may smite them with my spear and magic helmet.

At 12:06 PM, Blogger tinyhands said...

Adrianne- I may have paraphrased the emails a bit.

kTp- Let me assure you, you're quite different, my dear.

Z- Tuesday is a possibility. Check your hate mail.

Jeth- Nah, they're right after all. I'm a terrible person for not updating my blog. :)

At 12:13 PM, Blogger evilsciencechick said...

Dear TH,

I hate you.

Glad you posted again. Shame on you for making me worry! And you know if you keep petting your goat like that you'll go blind.

At 3:27 PM, Blogger Jethro said...

But, I wanted to smite someone with my magic helmet.

At 9:38 PM, Blogger J. said...

For the record, I don't hate YOU I hate blogspot's comments. It has taken me 1 minute and 37 seconds to get to the comment screen. God only knows how long it will take to publish this ever important comment to your comment section.

P.S. I'm glad to see that you're not immune to the hate love going around. :) And there ain't nothing like petting the goat to relieve stress.

At 12:03 AM, Blogger tinyhands said...

ESC- Boy that brings up some old memories of being teased by the other boys at boarding school. "GOAT PETTER!" they'd shout. Young boys can be so cruel.

Jeth- Sorry, this is the no-smoting section.

Jeanette- It's sure been bad this last week or so. I'm sure thinking about the haloscan.


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