Gettin' my perv on
So I flip on the tv last night... (aside: What great story doesn't start that way?)I've got an old tv downstairs that doesn't tell you right away what channel it's on, so I assume it's still on Home Shopping Network. You guys watch HSN, right? Fabulous merchandise, fantastic values, and entertaining celebrities. Once you watch you have to put the phone number on speed-dial, because you only have so much time to get in on the action. So the picture comes up and I see a bunch of cute girls in swimwear. Nice. Where's the phone?
HSN: "Good Evening. My name's Beth, how can I help you?"
Me: "Hi Beth, it's me. I'd like a 'Miss Connecticut' and 2 'Miss Hawaii's please. Account number 77057."
HSN: "I beg your pardon?"
Me: (hits "channel recall" on TV remote - NBC)
"Umm, just a sec..."
HSN: "Sir?"
Me: (grabs TV Guide - 8pm: Miss Teen USA)
"Sorry, I'm watching the wrong channel. Call you back later."
HSN: "Ok, thank you and have a good night."
So I'm clearly gettin' my perv on when I call HSN and the girl is so cool with it. Polite, even. I'm going to marry a girl like that someday. This blog is dedicated to HSN Operator Beth...I think I love you.
[Note: The name and account number have been changed because that's what you do when you publish a story about someone else and an account number.]
10 Comments:
Happy Groundhog Day
Haha. I was going to leave an angry comment, but I get it now.
I think you've just explained the mysterious 'men and shopping channels' thing. Every now and again The Man starts raving about some fabulous new engine oil and I have to remind him that WE DON'T HAVE A CAR.
It's the women. It's always the women.
"they say we're young and we don't know we won't find out until we grow"
This is a RECYCLED post!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Kate, that's what I was thinking... hmmmmm. Texasboy, Beth is waiting for more original material lauding her beauty and wit.
OHHHHHHHHHHHH, DUH. It's GROUNDHOG DAY. You even gave me that clue up there, the one that says "Happy Groundhog Day," even. AND, #3GA even sang me the lyrics. I'm oh-so embarrassed to be using up valuable oxygen.
BHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!
hehe...perve. trying to buy teenage girls on HSN. pft!
you have to do the russian mail order bride thing for that, silly!
Apologies to those who didn't get it, and I didn't expect everyone to though that shouldn't imply that I think any less of you. In homage to the movie Groundhog Day, in which Bill Murray relives the same day over and over, this was the first blog post I ever wrote, long before I knew any of you. It should come as little comfort that I'm no less of a perv (eww, mister) now than I was then.
Oh sure, NOW I get it. And I even think it's funny. (Hangs head in shame)
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