as told to (your name here)

Housekeeping

Ok, time to clear up a few loose ends...
1) Yes, I'm an idiot. I blogged using the phrase "As you can see, I've changed..." which is about 9.5 on the dumbass scale, since you couldn't see unless you'd been here from Day 1, which you weren't. (aside: I know where you were. Let's not fight about it again.) The original title of my blog was "The View from my skull," which I had hoped would conjure images appropriate to my belief that my body is just the means for getting my brain from one place to another. It didn't, and it sucked.
2) What's up Singapore? There are an awful lot of you fuckers blogging! According to the 2004 CIA Factbook there are about 4.3 million Singaporeans, but this afternoon I read about 4.4 million blogs from Singapore. So either some of you have blogged twice or the CIA is wrong. (aside: Mentioning "The Company" twice in a blog ought to get me my own file, no?)
3) Woke up today with the same headache I had yesterday. 800mg ibuprofen (aside: brand-name withheld until endorsement check arrives) and 440mg naproxen-sodium (aside: ditto) later it's still there, just not hurting to the point that I want to do bad things and blame it on the headache. It was preceded yesterday by some funky visuals that I thought were attributed to reading too many Singaporean blogs.
4) I've got an awesome idea for a new blog, just in case I have to ditch this one and head down to Old Mexico (see #2 above). I'll try to let you know before I cross the river...
5) Several of you have asked how on earth I could burn ramen. Let me explain: I'm a cooking savant. Seriously world-class, Iron-Chef-can-toss-my-salad (pun-intended), recipes-are-for-pussies, excellent cook. I can eat a dish in a restaurant, then go home and recreate it from scratch. Unfortunately I don't cook like that all the time. See, I live alone and I can't CLEAN worth a damn, so if I cook some fancy "Emeril-should-give-up-cooking-and-go-wax-my-car, bitch" meal I have to clean up after myself. So I was making a simple braised chicken wings with ramen in a teriyaki/mirin-reduction that got a little over-reduced because I was elbow-deep in hot, buttery, salty edamame heaven and I wasn't watching it. The result: It smelled like ass and tasted like burnt ass. Lesson learned.
6) Thanks to all for the kind words. Even if you hate my stuff, I love knowing someone read it. Infinitely more satisfying than prancing around the condo nude with the blinds open.

Had class #2 tonight- Statistics for Business. There is a new professor teaching this course this semester and rumor has it it's because there were too many complaints about the last one. This guy is so old I think he died 10 years ago. He was completely unprepared to lecture and kept losing his train of thought. When most people lose their train of thought they go off on a tangent, talking about something totally different, right? Not this guy. He just shut down. Eyes open, mouth agape (aside: excellent word, agape). Maybe the pacemaker was still set on "Manilow" and he just needs a tuneup. At the break, one girl mentioned it was like watching paint dry. No no, dear. With paint you get the fumes, a little contact buzz. This was definitely NOT like watching paint dry. On the bright side, there appears to only be one required text, so when I get to make a second trip to the bookstore to get my Finance text I can return the second statistics text. True, not much of a bright side, but if you've read any of my other posts... No cute girls in this class either. It's going to be a long semester.

posted by tinyhands @ 11:58 PM